Disgusting....

Well, needless to say everything I purchased my last trip to the grocery store is long gone. The final food item was consumed - raw, cold, in the middle of the night - by the sleeping eater...

I woke up yesterday morning to find an empty can of vegetable soup. The fork was still in it, but no liquid, which leads me to believe that the broth had been drank from the can, since you certainly can't scoop sauce out with a fork...it's the prongs...I'm also more than sure that it was eaten cold since there was no bowl in sight and no working stove (yeah, the fuse blew about three weeks ago, we still haven't gotten that fixed yet...ever try to make mac and cheese on a grill..) and I think we all know not to microwave a metal can....I think you would draw the same conclusion as me with this one....raw soup for sure.

The soup was evidently just an appetizer, however. There, on the counter, much to my disgust were two....yes two.....empty...very very empty....containers of "Fancy Mushrooms". Please, you must check these out the next time you're at the grocery store...they are, what I believe to be, pickled mushrooms. They're these tiny tiny mushrooms (whole) soaking in some sort of liquid. I almost threw up on the spot when I imagined what the consistency of these mushrooms must be like.

In my mind, I think of him mixing the mushrooms with the soup for a little more substance, and perhaps cooking it on a grill.....wishful thinking I believe. I know the true fate of that cold can of soup and those fancy fancy mushrooms.

In response to the My Night Out comment

The problem with locking up the food is that when he can't get access to it he becomes violent. This has happened in the past, but just as an example, the other night he was trying to get out of the room to get a delectable delight from the kitchen. Somehow he got turned around in the bedroom and had lodged himself between the dresser and the wall. He could NOT find his way out of the room and started panicking and pounding on the wall and dresser in an effort to, I'm guessing, beat the door down. Eventually he woke himself up and realized his error....and kindly went back to bed. His arms were covered in bruises from frantically trying to get out of the bedroom...

I believe that I will choose to leave the food readily available to him. I dont want any tragic accidents....I picture a refrigerator, securely locked, toppled over on top of the poor MBE from his violent attempt to bust it open in search of his tasty treats.

Is it the mice or the MBE?

He's actually been good for a while, here and there he'll snack on a little something, but mostly he's been good. Don't get me wrong, he still eats every night....one night he finished off an entire order of Cheesy Ciabatta from Green Mill, another night he ate the rest of the cheese slices, he polished off the hamburger buns, half another loaf of bread, etc etc...the usual indulgences.

I believe I mentioned before the cottage cheese incident, which I'm still recovering from, all I ever wanted was a mere scoop of cottage cheese and I come home from work to the top of the container spinning on the stove from the whirlwind that was MBE the night before. I'm used to the cheese being gone, and the soy milk, but I hate being surprised by something being missing that I so desperately want to snack on...

Anyway, I digress, Sunday I had the entire house to myself. It was nice, I cleaned up all the crumbs on the kitchen floor, washed the dishes and decided to make myself a little lunch....it was this fantastically tasty sweet and sour rice....soooo good. I ate about half of it and put the rest in a bowl in the fridge. I figured I would eat it for dinner on Monday night. Well, I'm not sure what I was thinking. Part of me thought that he surely wouldn't eat a bowl of sweet and sour rice, that's way to healthy for his late night binge. Secondly, I thought perhaps if I just left it in a bowl, uncovered, he might leave it untouched thinking it was something not worth eating. Well, I was wrong. Monday night I went to pull the bowl of rice out to heat up and endulge...when I opened the fridge I was so excited to see the bowl still sitting on the shelf...tragically it was empty....he had eaten all but six grains of rice....and politely placed the uncovered bowl back in the refrigerator, right where I had innocently left it.

I have come to realize that nothing is safe....

Then yesterday, I am eating a tasty dinner of cereal, with the last drop of soy milk left in the house and I decide toast sounds good. I grab some bread from the top of the stove and pop it into the toaster only to notice that an entire corner of my bread had been chewed away....I look at the bag and it had been chewed through as well....for a split second I thought....what the fuck is MBE doing!? He can't even open the bag any more, he's just going to gnaw through it!?

Come to find out....we have a mouse problem. As much as MBE eats in the middle of the night, at least he doesn't shit uncontrollably while doing s0.

So I've been on vacation and when I come back...

So, I was in Vegas for a few days, which means no update....don't you worry though, when I got back the MBE was back with a vengeance...

I came back Sunday, we had company over for dinner, which was steak, baked potatoes, salad, garlic bread...it was delicious...you know no leftovers ever had a chance. Luckily, there wasn't much food for him left to snack on...however...Sunday night he ate:

Top the tater (I'm not sure if you know what this is, but it's this sour cream type spread with chives and other spices in it) he ate this plain, no potato, no bread....just a spoon and Top the tater.

Sunday night was nice mellow night for the eater, just a snack.

However, I finally decided that I HAD to get some groceries, and I planned ahead thinking that if I just buy two of the most popular midnight snack items I will still have some left the next day to potentially make dinner. I was sorely mistaken...

Last night, he ate:

An entire loaf of bread (not one slice had been eaten before he ravaged it)
An entire bag of hamburger buns (that's 8 buns)
the rest of the garlic bread from sunday (about a half a loaf)
an entire bag of string type cheese
two bananas

I had to pause to throw up while writing this....I had no idea the human body could consume so much bread. It's disgusting.

In addition to the items that were eaten, I also purchased some peanut butter, frozen macaroni and some soup.

The peanut butter I already know is safest in the purse.

I'm thinking about keeping the frozen macaroni in there.

When I asked him about it today, he offered no apologies, just an embarrassed laugh. I'm left thining if this condition is really that uncontrollable that you can't realize when your body has had it's fill of carbs....

I was an idiot and bought another loaf of bread today....I will be keeping that nestled in the purse right next to the peanut butter. I hope he doesn't figure out my secret and rummage my room for my hidden treats...

My Night Out

I decided to take a night off from tracking my sleep eater, actually I had a friend in town from Las Vegas and I certainly had to show her that we can party out here too....

Anyway, I was out, all night. I came home at 9am Saturday morning to find the following:

An empty 1 pound bucket of potato salad ( the thing was full when I left, I bought it Friday night)
An empty bag of cheese slices (again, this was purchased Friday night, by me, so I know it was full)
5 Hamburger buns

It doesn't seem like much, but I have to say, I am absolutely amazed that he ate a pound of potato salad and had room for more. I mean, you couldn't have gotten so much as a potato out of this container....it was wiped clean. Yet, he still had room for a package of cheese and several hamburger buns (which he believes he made pickle, mustard and cheese sandwhiches out of).

If you are even the slightest bit overweight, might I suggest living with a sleep eater, it's a great appetite suppressant....I haven't eaten in weeks...

Here We Go..

So, there were a few nights where it wasn't so bad, maybe just a small piece of a leftover missing. Then the father in law came to town, they made some beer can chicken (with the Busch Light...my fav). Sinci FIL was in town, I ended up sleeping on the sofa, FIL got the bed. Well, much to my dismay, the MBE (that's midnight binge eater, thanks for that one JJ) got up in the middle of the night for his usual snack. Filled up his arms with any variety of foods and plopped right down on the couch for his feast. I'm sure you can put two and two together here....he sat right on me. Woke him up....and he stumbled back to bed.

I was so traumatized, I have no idea what he ate that night. I got up and left, didn't return until the next day....when I overheard him saying he was mortified....as was I MBE, I know you binge in your underwear...